June 23rd, 2019


Back from church again. (Possible trigger warnings for discussing icky -ists and their icky slurs.)

I keep having thoughts and feels about this, of course, as it's a huge thing for me. "Mormon" was the utter core of my identity in so many ways for so long (I mean, I was a "nice Mormon girl" and Mormon held out longer of those three than "nice" or "girl" did!) So finding a new spiritual home is a big deal. I'm trying to not "fall in love" too fast here, but it's hard not to, every week has another flavor of "Oh god, this is how it should be!"

Anyhow, today was fascinating to me, because the sermon was centered around emancipation, liberation, the Black Lives movement, and spent some time on an attempt by a white male rationalist philosopher pastor to split and/or change the UU faith to be less feels and more reals.

The thing that fascinated me was that when our pastor started to describe the guy and his book and his movement, the more words she put out, the more I went "I know him!"

I do not literally know him, of course. Never met him, never read about him, never heard his name or heard of his book. But I know him all the same, because a lot of the similarly-non-mainstream spaces I lurk in around the net are infested with him. He's definitely a man, definitely cis. (He probably thinks that "cis" is a ridiculous term and he has no problem with trans people, they can get on with their lives, but really, cis is practically a slur and I wouldn't call you a tranny, so don't call me cis.) He considers himself an intellectual, and a rational being. His opinions are all founded on logic and reason, and are objective. He may admit to having feelings (especially male-appropriate, non-vulnerable feelings such as anger) but they don't affect his judgment. He probably thinks SCIENCE is great and if his focus isn't philosophy, it's one of the "hard" sciences and he's therefore quite dismissive of the soft sciences as less "real". If his focus is philosophy, he probably pushes the notion that it's based on math and on the works of "genius" thinkers and that one can come to a "true" or right conclusion about philosophical matters if one is only properly rational about them. He may really like Jordan Peterson. He may actually know jack and squat about huge swathes of past philosophical thought. Or present philosophical thought. He isn't a racist, and of course he's all for things like "equality of opportunities, but not equality of outcomes" and for some reason he knows a lot of lists of statistics about IQ and race. (Oh and he definitely thinks IQ is a meaningful number and his is at least one standard deviation above the norm. I've never met one of these guys who didn't have that particular trait. An aside on that: So's mine, guy, and I'm an idiot. IQ is not really meaningful.) He's probably straight. He has no problem with gay people (any more than with trans people, or people of color, or women) but Pride really needs to tone it down, and why are there all these kinky people at Pride, anyway? Nice, "normal" gay couples are wonderful, but this BDSM shit is just making things harder for gay people. Not that he judges you for that, either! He doesn't kink-shame! Just keep it private, right? It's not something to be proud of, come on. Anyway, why are we still having Pride, homophobia ended when gay marriage was legalized in America. Also on the subject of his straightness, he's very likely to be single, he's very likely to have some "controversial" opinions that are actually dead mainstream about rape culture and the Me Too movement and women in general. He's not sexist, but, you know, women are kinda all bitches, aren't they? He's "as liberal as they come." He's not Republican! He's insulted by the very thought that he might be towards the right politically! He either has a "both sides suck" view of politics and describes himself as a centrist or a moderate or something along those lines, or he's a libertarian. (Or both!)

You get the picture. If you're a nerd, or in any male-majority fandom, or have ever been around the skeptical or humanist movements you definitely know this guy. Any individual "this guy" may not have the full package (I know one who's gay) but they're all generally the same. They're appalled at the idea that you could consider them right-wing, or racist, or any other -ist, but when you look at the assumptions beneath the things they espouse, they're -ist as hell, and it's all based in an intense egomania and sense of superiority. (Which may or may not overlay an even more intense insecurity and feeling of inadequacy.)

And apparently one of them is trying to form a "no SJWs" version of the Unitarian Universalist church. Good luck with that, buddy! (Actually no, no good luck. Take a long walk off a short pier.)

Anyway, it was a delight to hear "my" pastor take this guy's racist nonsense to pieces. <3

I really am liking this church.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1537209.html.

Futher adventures in coffee!

My new grinder arrived today.

I may officially be a coffee hipster. :D

Although I haven't gone full coffee snob, because it was only a $25 grinder. But it is a ceramic burr grinder! Just a little, basic, hand-cranked one. So now I can spend about ten minutes frantically cranking, and get a lovely even grind that makes a much richer cup of coffee with less bitterness. Or I can (and I'm sure I often will) spend literally six seconds using the cruddy electric blade grinder and get a quick and dirty cup. Options!

I did take a glance at electric burr grinders, because six seconds to perfect grinds sounds nice, but not $140 worth of nice, which is where the "good" ones apparently start in price. (Hmm. At 5-10 minutes a cup, how many cups would I have to drink for $140 to be worth paying for the time saved, at minimum wage, say? I don't feel like doing the math now, maybe I will later.)

I know I'll eventually fall out of coffee as an obsession, and I don't feel it's worth investing that much money in, in any case. At least not just now. Maybe in a few years, if I'm still frequently making coffee, and my finances are a bit better, I'll go ahead.

I've dipped in and out of being super into tea over the course of my life (tea, earl gray, hot, but I take mine with Bailey's) so I'll probably dip in and out of coffee too. Right now I'm in the blooming excitement of a totally new thing, and also kinda enjoying the tiny little "fuck you" to the Mormon church and their coffee ban. :D Yes, I am petty. But coffee is also delicious.

P.S. Anybody want a nearly full bag of cocoa nibs? Or have a good idea of what to do with a lot of them? I'm not loving the flavor profile of this brand, it's got that acidic, "fruity" quality which I frankly dislike in chocolate. Some people seem to like it, people actually pay money for Lindt dark chocolate! :3 I wish I could sample the other brands for sale and find out if I like them or not too. I know I like the by-the-pound bulk nibs from the posh grocery store, so I may end up sticking with those even though they cost more than the bagged kind.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1537325.html.

It is happening!

I have watched Good Omens.

I absolutely watched it with shipping goggles on, but good god you nearly need to watch it with anti-shipping googles to come to any conclusion other than these two are madly in love with each other. <3 I am, of course, perfectly happy with people who want to write just-bros and BFF fics about them, I don't require that all ship as I ship, but seriously, it's the loudest subtext I think I've ever seen. I love it.

I'm also 1500 words into a fic.

There will be sex. Though it will not be much like most of my sex fics in certain ways...

But there is no way that there won't be angel/demon loving going on here, given them and given me. :D

The loving is the point, though. The sex is just bonus.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1537703.html.