I am goober-free, full of whisky, and trying to sew while slightly buzzed. AMA!

Ask me any question you'd like, about my personal life, about my art, about my writing, whatever.

I don't mind "intrusive" questions. I don't mind silly questions. I don't mind any sort of questions.

I do reserve the right to answer questions confusingly, though. :D

All questions answered. All answers guaranteed true. No answers guaranteed to be the one you wanted/expected.

Please ask me something!

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1582689.html.

Baby Shark has betrayed you.

Just an observation that passes through my brain now and then, when parents on the internet start talking.

Everybody seems to have all organic, screen-time-free, breastfed, and generally ideally raised children. They will all shake their heads and say things about the awfulness of parents who "let youtube babysit their children".

Then somebody brings up Baby Shark, and the groans echo. They're so sick of it, OMG its stuck in their head, their toddler won't stop singing it, it's the *worst*.

It's from Youtube. (Or certain tablet/phone apps.) You know, those things that all you perfect parents never let your children touch, ever. How do so many of you know what it is? How are so many of you afflicted with it all day, every day?

Sure, those of you who have older kids may know it as a meme, as something the kids learned at camp, or as something the kids sing to be obnoxious, but that's not most of the comments you're making. Mostly your comments imply that the Pink Fong version is being actually played repeatedly in your actual house and your pre-school age kids know it.

So suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure, none of you would ever, ever, ever in a million years do something so awful as to let your kids watch youtube. Sure.

(P.S. The culture that shames parents so hard for not being perfect that every single one of them lies through their teeth about how they're actually raising their kids is complete and utter bullshit that I get pretty mad about sometimes. But the Baby Shark observation always makes me chuckle just a bit all the same.)

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1582569.html.

A new story!

The House Special (5086 words) by bladespark
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Anon/Original Pony Characters
Characters: FemAnon, Original Changeling Character(s), Original Pony Character(s) (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic)
Additional Tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Foursome - F/F/M/M, human on pony, Vampony, Vampires, Biting, Consensual Non-Consent, Rough Sex

You've always been a little bit kinky, deep down, and since ending up stranded as the lone human in Equestria you've certainly had to broaden your sexual horizons. But now you've been directed to Ember's, the changeling brothel, where nearly anything can happen, including Ember taking a handsome human form for you. And given that you've been obsessed with vampires since you were a teenage girl, the fact that Ember's two partners are both vamponies is something of a plus.

(Or, LadyAnon visits AU Ember's (the brothel, not the dragon) and also there's vamponies, because the author has some kinks, okay?)

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1582096.html.

Writing community

The "this is so nice in concept and so very uncomfortable in execution" experience I'm currently having in an "inclusive" writing discord led me to wonder if there were *any* trans-specific writing groups out there, and after probably too much googling, the answer seems to be "nope!"


I don't know. I manage to run one discord, maybe I could manage to run two? But how would I reach people? Promotion issues strike again. Ugh.

I need to think on it further, and not do something solely out of depressive feelings.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1581647.html.

Doing things I am bad at.

So I figured I'd be at least mildly proactive about my frustrations with book marketing and how awful I am at it.

I did two things, once was look up romance writer's associations. That went...interesting places, let's say. >.< Turns out that the Romance Writers of America is in the middle of having a spectacular racist meltdown. So, uh, backburner that idea, I guess.

The other was see about getting my book on some local shelves. I did a ton of calling, e-mailing, and even driving out to stores this morning. I hate that kind of thing, I'm not good at it. I'm basically socially competent, and I have some practice with doing sales stuff, but always in the context of customers approaching me. Me shilling to "bigger" sellers is new, uncomfortable, and awkward territory, and that always puts me on edge. But I buckled down and did it anyway.

I got "We don't carry romance novels" from several places (at least once with a tone of shock like the guy couldn't believe I'd asked) and one "cool but we're overbooked on local authors" which makes me headtilt and go...what? But that was from a bookstore that ran a kickstarter to stay in business, so they obviously have an...interesting business model, I guess.

But one reply was positive and encouraging, though the person I spoke to isn't the one who makes the decisions, but she gave me that person's direct contact info, and said she'd put in a good word too, so I'm hopeful there.

Still waiting to hear back from several others.

Wish me luck, I guess.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1581505.html.


It is really frustrating, stressful, and just a big ball of aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa that if I want to actually do something besides sit on my writing, I must engage in many, many, many things that I am SHIT at. I'm good, or at least competent at the writing. I suck balls at self-pub, querying, formatting, editing, self-promotion, and pretty much everything else.

Can't somebody just magically take the stories, fix them up, publish them, and send me a cut of the money? Oh right, that's called a publisher, and the one I have doesn't fucking do half of that, I still have to do a lot of it!!!!!!

A partial solution to this would be to get an agent, in hopes of the agent getting me into a publisher that does things like advertise, or at least write cover blurbs, but guess what that requires?????????

Fucking querying, just for starters.


I hate everything.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1581126.html.

Writing news

Gilded Pages (which is what Lord Librarian has turned into. Much better title!) is provisionally finished. It's a pretty rough rough draft, the two halves need some work to meld, and I'm honestly not sure if I should package it as books one and two, or as a single tale. There are two entirely distinct arcs here, but they immediately follow, so... Dunno.

I have also finally compiled a fairly complete list of stuff I can post as regular and/or bonus content to Patreon. I've been piling up dribs and drabs all over, but having them in one place helps.

Further things I need to do, on the writing front:
Finish another Star Tiger chapter.
Finish another Ember's chapter.
Finally drop a line to a couple of customers about potential commissions. I don't like to take more than two at once, as writing is more prone to the whims of the muse than sewing is, but I've had several people express interest and one in particular I definitely need to get back to.
Work more on the trans bingo challenge. I still have just two finished stories for that. I need to get some better ideas. The prompts just aren't sparking it for me right now. I *know* I want to do a Good Omens one, and a Zelda one... Dunno, I'm sure I'll come up with something eventually.

Think that about covers it for current writing goals, though of course it doesn't go into the literally dozens and dozens (as in well over 50, possibly closer to 100) of stories I've begun and never finished, nearly all of which I do intend to finish someday. It's a method that's sometimes crazy-making, but it also works! It's very random, and some will probably never get done, but there's nothing like getting sudden inspiration, adding another couple thousand words, and finishing a project that's been waiting for years in just a couple of hours.

In fact I had that happen last night, only even moreso, because I wrote I think 50 words, and it was done. It's a story I'd totally forgotten too, a small bit of "very much my favorite kinks" AU self-insert smut that I'd definitely written while in *that* kind of mood and then forgotten about once the story's climax (and probably mine, to be TMI at you all) was done with. Re-discovered it today, added an actual few lines of winding down, and slapped it up on Patreon. :3 It's MLP, so it'll be up on FimFiction and AO3 sometime next week! If you happen to like ponies, human-on-pony, vampires, bisexual group sex, or rough sex/sexual domination, you might like it!

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1580975.html.

The key to keeping your New Year's resolutions...

...is to make easy resolutions.

It's the 8th! I'm not dead! I haven't thrown the goober child out a window! She is in school right this very minute! I get six whole hours away from her every week for the next several months. Wheeeeee!

So in the two hours of today's chunk I have left, I plan to write more, and also sew a little. (And maybe come up with a real title for this current story. Working title is Lord Librarian, but it's not a great title.)

Also, we're trying to do potty training. God helps us all. >.< She *has* to be trained by September next year, though! Knowing her and her resistance to change, I figure I probably should have started already. Sigh. Today's plan is almost certainly going to get me peed on, but it's gotta be done.

So that's my actual resolution. Get the kiddo at least mostly peeing in the potty during daytime hours before kindergarten.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1580799.html.

I wrote!

I feel like Write Every Day was both really good for me, and also burned me out. I'm not the kind of person that can handle constant pressure, not even when it's low and has lots of positives. So I haven't been actively trying to write this last week.

But two days ago I had some thoughts about a story that had been stuck for ages, and last night the goober child's bedtime ended up giving me a few free minutes, wherein I wrote about 500 words and got the thing unstuck.

Today I've added another 2k to that! Whee! Might get in some more before I crash, too.

It's an oddball little project. Gay romance set in my Eternal Kingdom setting, which is the place my published stories Stallion Assassin and Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme are set.

Those are a tidy pair of examples of what the setting is for, because it's designed to be where I drop stories that I want to re-work from "not original/not all mine" to "original and all mine."

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme was always original, but it was also set in somebody else's homebrew roleplaying setting, where I used to play various characters. I wanted to remake that world and make it entirely my own. And I also was tired of heteronormativity, so I totally redid the story from straight to queer. :D

Stallion Assassin, meanwhile, was originally Legend of Zelda fanfic! (Based on Dark, still one of the most popular things I've ever written, certainly the biggest thing in a small fandom.) I just swapped from "whatever the heck Hylians are" to "were-horses" for reasons that seemed like a good idea at the time, and turned out really well in the end, so hey! (I mean, it was basically melding Link and Epona into one character, and then making Dark Link a horse too, that's all.)

So this is where I send fanfiction that I want to completely revamp. Ergo, when I decided that my fun porn story, Over The Moon would make a good original, I plopped it down there. But when I was done converting it, I wasn't happy with it. Over the Moon depended heavily on both people knowing Twilight and Luna, and on Clair de Lune, the story it was a sequel to. I felt that Clair de Lune, while something I loved and put a ton of feels into, just did not translate well outside of pony at all. And was indulgent fluff, and not a "real" story by certain metrics. They're silly metrics, but it's true that "I wrote this to revel in happy trans feels" is mostly only appealing to other trans people, it's not a broad story category. So I came up with the idea of giving Mathis and Auron, the Twilight and Luna in the revamped story, their own unique backstory. Mathis is still a librarian, Auron still a prince, and there's still a Nightmare Moon of sorts too, but everything else has been changed.

That's what I'm working on right now. An original M/M romance that started as an M/F pony porn sequel to a trans-centered indulgent fluff ponyfic. (I could write an essay on why the trans stuff didn't end up in, but it didn't. Although I want to do some more trans and genderfeels stories in this setting, I plan on putting one of my trans bingo pieces there. My headcanon has the Eternal Queen of the Eternal Kingdom having some genderfeels stuff going on, and I've had a bunch of notes for ideas of things to do with her/them, but it hasn't pinged my muse yet.)

Anyhow. Writing! I am off now to do more of it. The story is at its dramatic climax, at least the first, adventure-y one. The porno climax will happen after.

This entry was originally posted at https://bladespark.dreamwidth.org/1580458.html.